Revelations from Facebook

1) Some people will send you multiple friend requests despite multiple rejections. Conversely, your feelings might be a little hurt when you send a request and don't get any response. "But I know that guy!" you think, "and he knows me!" You also know it's not that deep, but it still hurts a tiny bit.

2) Certain people will use this strictly to brag about the latest vacation, workout, kickass home made meal, kids, school, etc. You will never hear about a loss at the blackjack tables, a food poisoning episode, a missed flight or a flat tire from these people. It’s all awesomeness squared, all the time. Their lives are golden.

3) You will also hear about parenting. Some of these stories will make for good birth control.

4) Friday is a big deal people! TGIF!

5) And stemming from #4, we can all agree that Mondays suck. And weekends go way too fast.

6) Apparently Facebook serves as some kind of free advertising platform for some people. There’s a reason Facebook puts the advertisements along the margin. People don’t go to Facebook to read a sales pitch.

7) Sometimes it’s a political soapbox and I have to ask: is this really effective? All I see is that people either comment in agreement or get pissed off. Can't we all just get along?

8) People have a lot of time for games, quizzes, throwing things, passing out drinks, giving out poker chips, and so on.

9) High school didn't end with graduation.

10) You wonder if wishing someone a happy birthday really counts because you had the reminder on your page of said person’s birthday. You also wonder if you should wish the people you consider more acquaintances than friends a happy birthday, or if that would be entirely too phony.

11) You feel a momentary sense of dread when you get a notification that someone tagged you in a photo.

12) “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey” are popular for status updates.

13) You censor yourself. Someone might say, “Wow, this is a great photo. I wonder where that guy is now.” “Oh,” you think, “you mean the same guy you said looked like he had been hit in the face with a sack of nickels? That guy? Hm. No idea where he is.” Yeah, don’t post that.

14) 10-25% of the people on your list are logged on regularly. The rest know how to log out and live life offline.

15) Sometimes you want to comment on a post or a photo, but if it's one of your more popular friends, you skip it because you don't want receive the eleventy million notifications about other people that comment after you.

16) The pencil treatment is a useful tool. You can hide people’s posts without them suspecting a thing. “Unfriending” someone is also a-okay. Blocking is another handy dandy option if you find the person intolerable.

17) It’s not so easy to conduct the actions mentioned in #16 in real life.

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